The Exes

Ok, so I have just read my yesterday's post. I can understand why I don't get a lot of comments. I write like I think, sort of. Rather I organize my thoughts a lot more before I write them down. That being said can you imagine the jumble that is perpetually in my head? Oh yes it's that fun!
Moving on. I get married in 10 days, well I guess it might be showing as 9 since it's after midnight. Anyhow very soon. This is leaving an intresting impression on me. I know that I am already married, yadda yadda yadda. There has been far more anticipation for this marriage and a HELL of a lot more work. So I feel more of the anxiety.
I have been thinking about some of the past boys. I thought that I would address it. Lucky you, eh?
So my very very very first boyfriend, one that we can call a boyfriend, was Arvelle. He was an American Army boy. I met him when I was in Korea. He was 6'4", and for the record I am 5'0". Interesting, no? Oh yes.... I could piggy back him and his feet would drag on the ground. Anyhow we had an interesting relationship. He was an ass and I was naive and lonely in the Korean town of Taegu all alone. I am convinced he cheated on me when he went stateside and I went home to Canada. Buggar! Oh well, I learned that I need a back bone, and I sprouted a little one. Anyhow the whole thing ended when I moved to Seoul without telling him. I hated my job, my boss was the quintessential bad Korean boss and Arvelle was an ass. The boy had no clue how lucky he was, so I left without telling him. It took him a week to notice.
Then while I was in Korea there were *cough*several*cough* guys that I met. I wasn't a slutty girl, but I did date some of them and learned some more about the boys, particularly the American Army variety. Yeah... some are pretty, all kinda heroish, many really dirty and horny.
Anyhow I am back in Canada. I meet Mike. We have fun. YAY, cute, fun, creative. YAY ME! Oh them The Conversation, in which he interrupts an early relationship make-out session and he asks where I "think this is going?" I reply all casually "lets just have fun and let things happen."
He makes a face, and hems and haws, and says... (you need to sit for this)
"I can't see myself ever loving you because you aren't thin enough."
OH YES HE DID!!! I untangled myself from him and demanded to be taken home. I didn't talk to him for a few weeks. Finally I took his calls. We went to a movie, and I was mean mean mean to him. I can be really witty at times, and I can make the wit mean. Let me tell you Internet, that was some of the meanest wit I have ever let flow. He took it all in, and never flinched. We went out again several times. Then I decided that I wanted to go to England. We started dating. I felt that I made him pay enough. (*cough*goodsex*cough*) Anyhow a few weeks before I leave he asks if there was any chance I would change my mind and stay in Canada. I tell him, "$800 non-refundable ticket". Also he didn't want to have children. I think I may have mentioned before that I would like to have my own little brood. So I reasoned with him that one of us would be frustrated later in life and I don't think that a relationship is the best for the two of us. I go to England.
While in England I met guys, but I didn't have a relationship with them. I have to tell you a story about this one bloke I met, but I'll save that for a whole new post, this story needs it's own post.
So I come back to Canada. I end up in Calgary and meet lots of guys. But I was working like a crazy person and there was no time in my life for anyone. Enter Maximus. Now I am not sure how Maximus would classify our relationship, but for this post I will say that there was one. We saw a lot of each other over an extended period of time, but there was no beginning or end. It just kinda was, and then it wasn't. For the record we are still friends today, I even invited him to my wedding. Anyhow we had a lot of fun, and had great conversations. He is a very intelligent man and knew which buttons to push to make me fly into a rage, only so he could laugh at me, and make me realize that I am a dork. Mostly we "argued" about the merits of being Canadian. He is American but lived half of his life in Canada. He is a Republican, and I AM NOT. I am sure that there are still some traumatized restaurant goers in Calgary who listened to some of our conversations. In any case he was great, but I worked a lot, and then he moved back to the US. Funny coincidence he lives near to where I live in CA! HA!
After good ol' Maximus there was more dating and playin' the field, and enter Peter.
Oh Peter. He was Greek, he was a football player, he was smart, he was metro sexual, he was everything I thought I would want in a guy. He was an ass. He would only come to my house, I never went to his. We never went out. He would never stay the night. I never met any of his friends. And Internet? The, uhm... stuff? Not so good. But the boy was pretty. So pretty. And he was smart, so intelligent, we were well matched in that respect, we could have the most interesting conversations. I learned a conversationalist does not a good boyfriend make. He wouldn't commit. I started to wonder if he was married and I was a secret. I know that his "job" may not have been on the up and up. And I am on the up and up, I am such a goody goody that I had issues with that. There was another small complication. I met Peter through his brother. I kinda had a little thing with his brother, who was going to the states to play hockey on some farm team or something like that. So the brother-who called himself Chris, which wasn't his name I later found out, approved of me set me up with his brother- Peter. I didn't see a problem with it because I didn't have anything serious with 'Chris'. Anyhow 'Chris' didn't last long in the states and came back to Canada. He tried to hook up with me, I declined because of Peter. 'Chris' asked if we were serious. I didn't answer, but I wouldn't "hook up" with him. I told all of this to Peter who said that he would have been very upset had I "hooked up" with 'Chris'. Still Peter would not commit. So one day I call him and leave a stinging message on his cell because he stood me up. He returned my call, and left me a message proclaiming his love for me.
WTF!?
Yeah that's what I said.
So I ask him about this later, and he stumbles out this lame assed answer and I get fully fed up and essentially ignore him for a while. Eventually everything between us fades away. We would see some of each other for a while, but nothing really.
Enter Lionel. Lionel... oh the British boy with the accent. We worked together and found each other attractive. We decide to go for a beer one night and find that we are more than just a little attracted to each other. But we had to cut the night short. The next day I was going to Edmonton to play in a rugby tournament. So as we leave the pub it starts to drizzle. He walks me to my car and wishes me good luck. I thank him and start to get in as he walks away. I think that I want to have a reason to talk to him again, so I get out of my car, and it's raining harder now and I call out to him that he can call me at 8 pm the next day I should be home. He can't hear me, so he comes closer and I repeat myself. He hears and gets a big smile and leans in and kisses me. It was the most romantic first kiss I had had to date. I remember the smell of his cologne and the raindrops on his glasses. So ensues a relationship. It lasted a month. He decides that he wanted to get back together with this other girl and didn't want to cheat on me. Fine I say. I was pissed.
I spend some time with my brother and his friends and I end up with Darcy. He is a long time friend of my brother and quite intelligent, and he has this flaming read hair. I am not sure how I would classify this relationship, it was strange. Being in my brother's world is really surreal to me, we have always had our own circles, so being in his is strange. Anyhow Darcy tells my brother's girlfriend that I am not thin enough. She tells my brother who is devastated. And I find out. "Not again" I lament. I blow Darcy off and I know that he is a loser. Apparently he is married to some chick who is double his weight. I don't care.
A year later Lionel realizes that he still wants me and makes a sad attempt, I squash him. It was great.
So Peter. This time around it wasn't better.... It was just sporadic and lame. It wasn't a relationship, it was stupid and a waste of my time, but he is so good looking, sometimes a girl just needs to gawk at a guy... ya dig?
Then there was this little guy who was like an inch taller than me, and I can't remember his name. He was weird, so it didn't last. But there was an intense period of spending every non-working moment together. He was a little weird for me, and the conversations got bad fast. It ended. I just stopped it.
Oh and more Peter.
Then I meet this guy.
He was cute, but not quite the type of guy I have ever dated before. He is quite possibly the smartest person I have ever met. He is a great conversationalist, he loves my niece, all of my friends approve and he is sweet. I don't get a vibe from him that he is a user, I don't feel the need to have my guard up. But I have had it up for a long long time, and so it wasn't easy to put it down. I was always at ease with him, so soon it came down. Then I have to move away for work. I was okay meeting this guy, and going on dates with him even though I didn't think that he was "my type" because I knew I was leaving. Then I realized that he was growing on me. I brushed that feeling off. I moved, 4 hours away from Calgary. He came to visit me the first weekend I was there. I realized that I may have stumbled on to something here.
We make plans to see each other again, then again. I have to keep a calendar to keep track of where I am going, and when he is coming. Christmas comes and I take holidays and spend a lot of time with him. Then I realize that I love him. I LOVE HIM! I have never loved. I told Arvelle that I loved him, but it was in response to him telling me that he loved me. In retrospect I did not love Arvelle, I didn't know what it was. But now I know it's love. I keep it to myself; I don't want to scare this guy off.
I feel like this is a precarious relationship. I live a long ways away, we only had a few weeks of us both living in Calgary and he seems so perfect; and perfect never works for me. Time passes, we see each other every weekend, and doing everything we can to make sure that we see each other. Valentines comes. He comes to visit me. Finally I break down and tell him that I love him. He doesn’t return the thought. I am a little crushed. We continue to see each other every weekend. Then I move to a slightly closer town, now it's only a 3 hour drive. YAY. Around now he tells me that he loves me. I am ecstatic, elated and just plain ol' as happy as I have ever been. We go to BC, he meets my family and my friends, they all approve.
We still see each other every weekend. Then he goes away for a month to Europe. I pine for him. He comes back and I love him more, we are reunited and happy as can be. Weekend trips continue. Summer starts and we have a great time. More weekends. Fall time now. We go to the east coast and I am a bitch to him. We have fun, but the stress of my work has finally gotten to me and I can barely deal with it. He doesn't ever bat an eyelash and deals with it and still loves me. I feel that I love him so much that I might choke and die. I deal with the stress, and things are so perfect. Then work moves me close. We move in together, I get to see him everyday. EVERY. DAY. It's more amazing that you can comprehend.
He is offered a job in California, he accepts. We know that we have to be together. Now that we are living together and seeing each other everyday, and cuddling every night, we can't go back to the long distance thing. We get engaged, secretly. Then a week later we tell everyone and a week after that we are married and move to California. 6 months later, I am here; at his parents writing about him.
As it turns out he was my type. I had to go through Arvelle, Mike, Peter, Lionel, Darcy, Maximus, the nameless one and countless other dates to meet Adam.
I am so head over heels in love with him. I still can't believe my good luck to have met him and to be so lucky as to get to spend the rest of my life with him. I know that we are already married, and that on the 16th it's just a ceremony, but I feel no jitters, just anticipation, and luck. I am so lucky. I am so happy. I am so in love.